I'm in a blog funk. I feel like a big complainer, so I don't write. So instead, I'm going to use a blog prompt tonight. If it leads to complaining... well then it's justified. :)
Right now, I feel....
Unsettled. You all know that we moved 1100 miles from Texas to North Caroline back in late July. And I haven't yet felt settled in here. I like it well enough, but it's just not home. And I don't know if it will be. We had already been in a place that didn't feel like home for about 16 months before the big move, so that's quite a while to be experiencing this feeling.
Of course, we've still got the monster house in Texas on the market. The mortgage + rent payment will always make you feel like you've got a monkey on your back. So we're renting to keep our living expenses down. The last time I lived in a rental was back in 200-2001, and it was for a finite amount of time (while we had a new house built) - so I'm not even sure that counts. If you go back to the time before that, it was 1997 and I was pregnant with Cameron when we last rented. I haven't put much on the walls or hung any curtains in our townhouse. I don't feel like taking pictures of it to show to anybody. It's just not ours. Not that we're itching to buy here - because it doesn't feel like home yet.
Then there's the school issue. The kids have already switched schools twice - from Austin to Rockwall and from Rockwall to Cary. They have really done well with it, but that doesn't mean that I'm ready to do it again. But there is a new school board in place, and they are going to make some significant changes - and that's going to mean that Logan and Luke will almost certainly go to a different school next year, even if we stay in the townhouse. And that school will most likely be a year-round school. Blech. So we can stay here for the different school, or we can look into moving again to keep them in the same place. I'll take neither, please.
So I'm pretty bummed and feeling uncertain about a lot. But I've got some things that I can look forward to (trip to London, 20th reunion), and that's getting me through each day.
2 comments:
Complain! It usually makes me feel better. Just saying the words and owning the feelings helps me, even if I just write it down and then delete it.
And, it helps me knowing that other people are having frustrating issues in their life. God knows I am, and sometimes I wonder if everyone else is just sailing through life. Too many people only let the rest of the world know about the good stuff that happens. Kind of like those annual Christmas letters that are sugary sweet and just over the top. Lorraine & I want to one day send out the "real" Christmas letter. I wrote one a year or two ago, and she laughed until she cried. It was the truth, but probably not fit for public revelation.
I get the school issue. We just switched this year, and now thanks to the idiots that didn't vote for the mill levy our district is making MAJOR cuts. Including possible moving the GT center to another underenrolled, underperforming school. I will not move schools again. But I am hopeful. Unlike the general population of parents affected (there are cuts everywhere except one politically protected school), the GT parents are organized. They have reps going to every meeting - even those 25 miles away. They also are not just operating out of emotions. They have numbers to back up how stupid the option is. And numbers to show it actually doesn't save a dime. It's the schools around the 'protected' school that want us, because they have lost so many students to this school. It's bullshit. I hate politics. There Marcus not everything is roses here either.
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